The Ranger's Destiny (Army Ranger Romance Book 6) Page 12

  Holly chuckled at the sense in this. “You get what I mean, though. I don’t feel like it’s my place to tell him to get over it. Not that I’d ever use those exact words, of course.”

  “I wouldn’t expect you to. I didn’t raise my daughter to treat people that way.” Her mom sat back, frowning a little as she stirred her tea. “Do you know this is the right man? The one for you?”

  Did she know? Just the thought of it sent a flush creeping up her throat and over her face. Her heart skipped a beat as her stomach fluttered. But that was kid’s stuff. Not the sort of reaction that carried a couple through the ups and downs of creating a life together.

  Instead of focusing on the physical reaction he inspired in her, she thought back to everything he’d done. Fixing the window without being asked. Charging into a burning building to make sure she was safe, then going back to get Fiona. Sitting up all night in front of her house for days, then going in to work a full day at the office where his patients had already come to love him.

  Could she make a life with this man? Even after knowing him for such a small time? Yes. Happily, joyfully.

  Did he want to make a life with her? That wasn’t such an easy one to answer.

  “What bothers me is whether he thinks I’m the one for him,” she answered in a soft voice as Mason lifted Jack onto his shoulder while they cheered over some victory or another. “He’ll leave once his job is finished and we’re safe from these creeps.”

  “You have so little faith in him?” her mom asked, her eyebrows pulled together.

  Hardly. Holly had more than that. “I have nothing but faith that he’ll protect me.”

  “I don’t mean that. I mean in him, as a man.”

  “Mom, he isn’t here to set down roots. He came to do his job.” She turned to her mother, searching her familiar face for signs of understanding. “The more I think about him staying and wanting me—wanting us, me and Jack—the more likely it is that my heart will be broken when this is over. I can’t do that to myself.”

  “So you would rather protect yourself than take a chance?”

  “When I know he has no plans to stay?”

  “Do you know that, though?” Her mom leaned in, familiar perfume bringing back memories of so many talks just like this one. “Have you asked?”

  She gasped. “No.”

  “Why not? You’re assuming a lot, and you haven’t given him a chance to explain himself.”

  Holly shifted in discomfort. She was never any good at holding her own when her mother gave her that look. “I don’t want to scare him away.”

  “I know. And it’s easy for me to sit here and challenge you when I’m not the one going through it. I wish I could make things easier. That’s all a mother wants to do for her kids in the end. To take away the sting and make things go smoothly. I’m afraid I can’t do much right now.” Her mom patted her hand.

  Holly covered her mom’s hand with her own and squeezed it. “You’ve done plenty.”

  They settled back to watch the boys play. That was who they were, with Mason acting like a little kid just as much as Jack. His bright smile took years off his already youthful face, and their mingled laughter was a symphony that went straight to Holly’s heart.

  If she didn’t know better, she would’ve guessed she was looking at her future.

  And it was a beautiful sight.

  Chapter 27

  Keeping his eyes pinned on the road ahead, Mason couldn’t stop thinking about the day with Holly’s family. Spending time with Holly’s little boy had taken his desire for a family and turned it into a burning need. And not just any family, but Holly and Jack. Mason had instantly fallen in love with the little boy, and that had made it effortless to picture teaching Jack how to hit a baseball or throw a football. Fishing, camping, celebrating birthdays, and everything in between.

  Could he be the dad Jack needed and the husband Holly deserved? He certainly couldn’t do what countless men had done to him, walking in and out of his life like it was nothing.

  Just the idea of leaving Holly and Jack made him sick to his stomach. He wasn’t the man who could do those things. Once he loved, he was all in.

  He sucked in a sharp breath as the realization hit. He loved her. She was kind, thoughtful, and generous. Beautiful. A passionate, loving woman with a heart big enough to rescue dogs and choose to be a mom to a toddler. As short a time as it was, he loved her, and he wanted her and Jack.

  How did he tell her, though? Was love something you blurted out in the middle of a dogfighting investigation? Did it really matter when it was said as long as you said it? Just as he was finding the words, Holly broke the silence.

  “I want to thank you for coming with me today.” Her tone sounded off, but she’d just left Jack. That was hard on her, and Mason knew it.

  “I enjoyed it.” He smiled, taking another quick glance at her and smiling. “I—”

  “Jack sure enjoyed it. When you leave, I’ll explain that you were here protecting me and you have to go protect other people.” She squared her shoulders, offering a tight smile.

  For a second, Mason thought about asking what was wrong, but she was probably just tired. Now that she’d had time to process everything that had happened, it was to be expected. “Well—”

  She held up her hand. “It’s okay. You’re doing your job, and I appreciate it. When you leave, the town is going to miss you. I think all the single women will cry.”

  He shook his head. “Doubtful.”

  “I’m not going to have time for much of anything other than taking care of Jack and trying to get my clinic back together. I’ve been thinking about that all day. Making lists. I need to call my insurance first and go from there. I think I’ll need to rent a place while the old one is repaired.” She paused. “Oh, I could be your receptionist until you solve this case. I did say I’d help you hire someone.”

  Maybe he’d read the whole situation wrong. They’d kissed, but he’d been in enough stressful situations to know that emotions ran high, and it was easy to see things that weren’t there. Had he done that?

  “Besides, we know it won’t be long before Chester is in your rearview mirror, which means I need to take the job while I can. I can’t just sit and twiddle my thumbs; that’s for sure.” She grinned.

  He worked his jaw, pushing down the stupid fantasies he’d entertained. They were brief, but they’d been enough to shake him. He didn’t want to be alone anymore, but the person he’d pictured filling that space didn’t feel the same about him. “Right. Plus, it’ll make it easier to keep you safe.”

  “I doubt it’ll curb the rumors, but at least I’ll have a good reason for being there.”

  “Right,” he replied doing his best to keep his tone neutral. It wasn’t her fault he’d let his guard down. When he got back to North Carolina, he was taking a long vacation. He’d need it to get over Holly…if that was even possible. One thing he was sure of was that status quo was no longer good enough.

  * * *

  “Thanks for bringing me home,” Holly said as she reached for the door handle. “I really appreciate it.”

  Mason gave her a curt nod. “No problem.”

  He’d been so quiet on the ride home. Too quiet. She’d tried to start conversations with him, and he’d ignored her, seeming to be lost in his own world.

  He’d spent the day with Jack, and it made her wonder if he realized a family wasn’t something he wanted. Maybe if she didn’t have a child, they could have worked their way up to having children…eventually. She thought he’d had fun. It sure seemed like it at the time, but the longer he stayed quiet, the more her fears took root. From time to time, he checked his phone. It led her to believe he was expecting someone to call with information on the dogfighters. That maybe he was eager to get the case solved so he could leave.

  When he finally tried to speak, she’d cut him off so he didn’t have to let her down easy. It didn’t make it hurt any less, but she’d given him the out he w
anted. He’d come to Chester to protect her and bring down a dogfighting ring, not to find a ready-made family.

  “I guess I’ll see you in the morning?”

  “Yep,” he said, his tone clipped. Pulling out his phone, he tapped on the security app and scanned through the images. “It’s all clear, but I’ll walk you to the door to be safe.”

  She opened the car door, setting one foot on the ground. “That’s okay.”

  He pushed open his door and stood, bending down to look at her through the car. “Remember? This is why I’m here. To keep you safe.”

  Oh, like that was hard to forget. It was the giant elephant in the room that seemed to be cemented in place. “Right,” she said under her breath and got out of the car.

  As he walked her to the door, the uncomfortable silence from the car followed them, growing worse by the second. All Holly wanted to do was get inside her house, crawl into bed, and cry. Stupid. Why had she even entertained the idea that a man would want her? Sure, he could like her. He could even handle an evening with Jack. It was the long term no one seemed interested in.

  When they reached her door, Mason stuck the key in and held the door for her. “Have a good night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “You too, and thanks again.” She managed to fake a smile long enough to close the door. The second it was closed, she leaned her back against it and wilted to the floor.

  All she needed to do was hang in there long enough for Mason to catch the dogfighters. She’d survived worse. Dealt with harder situations than being lovesick.

  Groaning, she put her head in her hand and squeezed her eyes shut. She’d avoided the word until this point, and now that it was out, she couldn’t deny it. Her head, her heart, and all the other parts of her were in complete sync. She loved him, and he was leaving.

  He didn’t want her or Jack. Somehow, she’d made the mistake of allowing herself to live in a dream world where the hero decided he wanted more than action and adventure. Except, that wasn’t how things worked in Holly’s world. The hero did his job, saved the day, and then leaped tall buildings as he returned home, putting small towns and single moms in his rearview mirror.

  Picking herself up off the floor, she straightened and took a deep breath. As soon as this was all over, she and Jack would be living together again. Things would be back to normal. She’d be a mommy, a vet, and a rescuer. Those things had fulfilled her before Mason arrived, and they could do it again.

  Only, now she knew what it felt like to be held, kissed…warm and safe. But it wasn’t like she couldn’t find that again. Mason wasn’t the only fish in the sea.

  Even as she thought it, in her heart, it didn’t ring true. Either way, she’d live. She had to for Jack’s sake.

  Chapter 28

  Mason took in the sight of Holly behind the reception desk on Monday morning. “You’re sure this is okay?”

  She smirked. “What else am I going to do? I called around to check on the dogs, and they’re fine. I’ll be looking around for new space to lease until the damage is repaired across the street. Between now and the time I sign a lease, there’s nothing for me to do but sit around and twiddle my thumbs. And I did promise to help find you a receptionist.”

  “I never expected you to be the one in the hot seat.”

  “Neither did I,” she admitted with a soft laugh. “It’s okay. Besides, I feel safe with you.”

  Did she have any idea what it meant to hear that? “I’m glad. It’ll be easier to protect you here.” He gave her a smile before looking over the files of the patients who’d called ahead for an appointment. For once, there was someone in the office to keep track of them.

  This was nice. Too nice. Just like spending the day with Holly’s family had been too nice. It shouldn’t have kept him up all night, the memory of how great it had been, how good it was to feel accepted. How easy it was to fall into their lives.

  He’d tried to find the right words to tell her the night before, but she’d cut him off with talk about her vet clinic and taking the position of receptionist while she figured things out. Plus, as she’d noted more than once in the last few minutes of the drive back to her place, he was leaving Chester and returning to his life.

  He wasn’t the smartest guy on the planet, but he could put two and two together. He loved her, and the feeling wasn’t mutual. Why admit to a feeling when it wasn’t shared?

  It was a relief when the door opened and a patient stepped in to distract his thoughts, followed by another. From the looks of things, plenty of people had gotten sick that weekend.

  Their “illnesses” still allowed for plenty of time to listen to gossip, just the same. He answered more questions about the fire than he asked about symptoms as the morning wore on.

  “I’m starting to think there aren’t as many sick people in town as it would appear,” he said quietly to Holly during a brief break in the back room.

  She nodded in understanding. “I’ve fielded more than my share of questions too,” she confessed. “And there was plenty of swooning over you.”

  “Me?” He touched his sternum.

  “Stop kidding yourself. You’re a hot topic once again. So brave and dashing. The object of many a daydream.” She batted her eyelashes, which was the most adorable thing he’d ever seen—even if she was teasing.

  “I hate to break so many hearts.” He sighed, shaking his head. “If they only knew their physician lived a double life and won’t be around forever.”

  He meant it as a joke, of course, but she didn’t take it that way. Her smile slid away. “Yeah. I bet. Anyway, you’d better get back out there.” She hurried back down the hall to the front office, leaving him wondering what he’d said.

  He was still wondering as they closed up shop for the day when Holly would barely look at him. “Did I say something wrong?” he had to ask as she gathered her things.

  “No, not at all.” Only, she still wouldn’t meet his gaze. “I’d better get going. I have a property to look at a few blocks down from here, and I still need to call my insurance company.”

  “I can go with you,” he suggested.

  “No, thanks. You’re still undercover. Besides, everyone would see us together. I’ve heard enough whispers about us today to last me the rest of my life.” There was something almost savage about the way she slung her tote bag over one shoulder, coupled with the edge in her voice.

  “Holly, don’t go like this. Don’t leave angry.”

  “I’m not angry!” she shouted with her back turned.

  “No, you certainly don’t sound angry.”

  She whirled on him. “You’re the one who goes hot and cold on me. One minute, I think we’re heading for something special. Yes, it’s scary. It’s unknown and untested, but it’s nice. Right? Isn’t it? But then you stiffen up or change the subject…or tell me you’re going on a date with someone else or leaving soon, and you may as well throw a bucket of ice water over me. I never know where I stand.”

  “Holly—”

  She charged on, unwilling to let him have his say. There was too much weighing on her, clearly. “No, I’m not naïve. I don’t think that spending the afternoon with Mom and Jack is the answer. I wasn’t trying to trick you into anything. I wasn’t using Jack to get to you.”

  “I never said you were!”

  “But you barely said a word the entire ride back. Why? And this morning, you acted like it never happened at all.”

  “I…I didn’t think anything needed to be said. I had a lot on my mind after we left your mom’s.”

  “You could’ve shared some of it with me so I didn’t feel like I was alone in the car. We may as well be on different planets sometimes, and I don’t know what to think about it.”

  His hands dropped to his sides. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say. You know how complicated this is.”

  “Yes. I’m well aware.” She jerked the front door open. “I’ll call you if anything comes up, and don’t follow me.” She point
ed her finger at him.

  “Don’t walk out like this. Please.” He emphasized the last word, hoping she’d hear the plea in his voice, but it was too late. She was already gone, leaving him with a sense of having failed and his heart trampled. He’d give her a second and then follow. He still had a job to do, and she still needed to be protected. With as angry as she was, he didn’t need her running away any faster. Maybe when things were settled, he’d have the chance to tell her how he felt.

  He was already past the point of risking his heart. His destiny was in her hands, and he didn’t want to lose her.

  Chapter 29

  The jerk! How could Mason be so blind? He talked about his double life, about how he wasn’t who he was supposed to be, about leaving town once the case was closed.

  Did he ever once imagine what that might do to her? How it might make her feel?

  Holly impatiently brushed away tears with her hand, turning her car toward home. He didn’t need to know she’d lied about looking at a property. It was the first excuse to come to mind, and she’d blurted it out before thinking twice.

  “And I introduced you to my mother,” she grumbled, angry with both Mason and herself by then. “And Jack. Because, silly me, I wanted to hope a little. I fooled myself into hoping.”

  Her phone rang, tucked into the console. She glanced at it, irritated, expecting his name to be the one on the ID. Leave it to him to call and apologize, though he probably had no idea what he was apologizing for. How could he be so dense?

  It wasn’t Mason, however. The number came up as being blocked. She answered in spite of being behind the wheel. “Hello?”

  “Mama! Mama!” Jack’s voice.

  Her blood ran cold. “Who is this? Jack?”

  “Mama! Where are you?” He sounded so far away. She could barely breathe, her heart taking off at a sickening pace.